


Chasing The Dot

by Gloomier



Category: Naruto
Genre: Funny, Getting Together, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Prey Drive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:54:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27651650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gloomier/pseuds/Gloomier
Summary: In which Anko is a troublemaker, Kakashi is the victim, and Iruka reaps the rewards.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Comments: 6
Kudos: 89





	Chasing The Dot

Kakashi knew as soon as he spotted Anko sashaying across the room with a wide grin on her face that something awful was going to happen.

Among the ranks, jounin and tokujo especially, it was considered a bad omen.

The last time it had happened, Anko had spiked some punch with moonshine from Mist. There was a reason it was outlawed in pretty much every civilized town across the continent, and it was so strong that it even knocked Tsunade on her ass.

If the dignitary from Rock had not gotten trashed off the spiked punch too, there was a good chance the fiasco would have ignited another war.

Kakashi shuddered just thinking about it.

Anko trotted over to a bored-looking Shiranui Genma and leaned in to cup her hands around the tokujo’s ear. The man’s expression transformed in an instant and his conniving smirk now matched Anko’s.

These mixers happened every few months to help foster and build camaraderie among the ranks, and the only way to do that was to bust out the expensive liquor and serve cheap bar-quality snacks. Kakashi only ever stuck around these events for the free drinks because he didn’t have to craftily mooch off other people to get them. The other reason was that he loved the whiskey that came out of Lightning Country, but it was too unbearably expensive for just one bottle of the stuff. Kakashi may be very well off, but there was no justifying the insane price tag.

“What do you think she’s up to?” Tsume asked as she sipped what looked like a fruity cocktail.

Kakashi withheld his disgusted groan. “I don’t want to know. She’s got Shiranui in the mix now too.”

Anko’s eyes had homed in on him then and Kakashi wanted to run and hide or throw up. Possibly both.

“Looks like you’re the unfortunate target this time, Hatake.” Tsume snickered pitilessly.

For the most part, Anko had left him alone and Kakashi had been thankful for it. He never once questioned why that was, but maybe he should have. Anko lifted her hand, which was closed in a fist, and waved at him. It was a gesture that silently told Kakashi “I bet you can’t guess what’s in my hand!”

It wasn’t hard to deduce that she had just been waiting for the right time to exert her evil powers upon him. One by one she opened each of her fingers until a small cylindrical item dangled on a chain hanging off her thumb.

Beside him, Tsume choked on her drink.

Kakashi gave Tsume an expectant look. While he wasn’t familiar with the object Anko was taunting him with, Tsume seemed to be. It didn’t look dangerous, but looks could be deceiving.

“She has a laser pointer,” Tsume muttered.

“...Okay?” Kakashi said hesitantly as Anko wrapped her hand around the object like she was holding a calligraphy pen.

“Kakashi, your mom was Inuzuka, _and_ your clan has its canine ties too.”

“Uhh, yep.” Kakashi drawled. He didn’t understand what she was trying to get at.

“You have got to be kidding me!” Tsume cackled, very nearly choking for real this time.

While he waited for her to get a hold of herself, Kakashi entertained himself by scanning the crowd and ignoring Anko’s existence.

Then he spotted it.

His head jerked to the right as something zoomed through his peripheral vision. It was a red dot, and it danced across the floor, weaving around the legs of attendees and gliding across the large gaps of open space. It moved so fast, and it had Kakashi enthralled.

He had to get it.

Kakashi stalked his way through the crowd of mingling, tipsy people, following the strange dot, ignoring the irritated grumbling and curious looks. When Kakashi got close to it, it zipped away in the opposite direction, compelling him to do the same. He finally managed to corner the god damn thing near one of the refreshment tables, but as he closed in, it disappeared again.

Kakashi let out a frustrated growl and twisted around, scanning the room for his prey. He was not about to get outsmarted by a stupid red dot. After a couple of minutes of looking, Kakashi pushed his hitai-ate up to his forehead. The dot reappeared again before he could open the Sharingan.

Without a second thought, Kakashi lept into action. He was across the room in two seconds flat, colliding with the object his quarry had perched itself on. They went down hard, knees smacking against the wood of the floor, and someone yelped in surprise. Not wanting the dot to escape, he clapped his hands over it. It was then that Kakashi noted that the object he had trapped the dot on was warm and soft.

“Kakashi, what the _fuck_ are you doing?!”

Kakashi didn’t want to take his eyes off his hands, for fear of the dot escaping once more, but the commanding voice addressing him had Kakashi shifting his single-minded gaze upward to meet annoyed brown eyes

As Kakashi stared, Umino Iruka stared right back at him.

And he didn’t look happy.

Kakashi blinked and quickly analyzed his surroundings.

He had Iruka pinned to the floor on his stomach, straddling the man's thighs, with his hands trapping the red dot against the chuunin’s right ass cheek. He was also surrounded by a room full of interested onlookers.

Kakashi blushed and cleared his throat awkwardly, unable to come up with an excuse that wouldn’t get him killed. In the background, he heard Anko and Genma cackling wildly. Iruka opened his mouth to say something else, but Kakashi formed the seals for a shunshin before the sensei could sound out the first syllable.

His plan now was to hide out in his apartment until morning, and then get an overnight mission to regain some of his dignity. Kakashi hoped that everyone who witnessed the scene would get blackout drunk and forget it ever happened.

As Kakashi touched down in front of his apartment building, a solid weight rammed into him and sent him forward into the wall of the building. Kakashi caught himself just before his chin hit the wood paneling. He threw his right elbow back into his attacker as they crowded him against the wall. A hand caught it before the hit could connect and Kakashi’s arm was twisted behind his back. He tried to pull a kunai from his holster, but his attacker pinned his wrist to the wall.

“How the tables have turned,” Iruka purred into Kakashi’s ear, making him shudder.

Kakashi sighed in relief, melting against the wall. Not an enemy then.

“If you’re going to kill me, then make it quick. Preferably painless.” He said defeatedly.

Iruka’s mouth brushed against his ear as he chuckled. “Killing you would defeat the purpose of capturing you.”

Before Kakashi could pick that statement apart, his arms were free and his back was against the wall with Iruka pressing him into it.

“We’ve been dancing around each other for months, there are a lot of things I would rather do to you instead,” Iruka grinned.

_“Oh."_ Kakashi breathed.

He barely got the mask down before Iruka was kissing him senseless.


End file.
